…and i am still laughing. now usually i don’t do this, but here’s the IM conversation we had about it.
me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA how did you JUST make that hammer realization?
agoodthinglost: oh my god
me: i can’t stop laughing.
agoodthinglost: i just said “PLEASE HAMMER” while talking
and then it hit me
a third party is asking hammer not to hurt ‘em
me: oh, you’ve been saying it with an implied teeth-sucking noise, like, “please, bitch, you trippin’.”
or more like Hammer himself is telling people not to hurt ‘em
which is…the children? don’t hurt the children?
but that he was just inserting his own name for effect
me: HAHAHAHA - LIKE, PLEASE HAMMER? MAKE HAMMER HAPPY AND DON’T HURT THE CHILDREN?!?
agoodthinglost: okay, now i’m laughing.
because this sounds crazy but in my head i totally thought it was that way
me: i was totally unaware of the myriad ways that statement could be misconstrued.
like maybe in the same way that tarzan says his own name?
me: OH! okay, like hammer’s talking to himself. i just had to walk away from my desk, i’m laughing so hard.
agoodthinglost: people in my office are like “what are you laughing at” and i’m like, “i can’t even begin to tell you”
i think maybe i was taking cues from the “have you seen her” song
the way he calls HIMSELF hammer
“can you help hammer find her?”
so by that, maybe it’s like, “hey - looks like he just throws in his own name when he’s speaking sometimes”
hahahah this sounds nuts but i swear to god i thought this before 10 minutes ago
me: you’re right — he referred to himself in the 3rd person a lot.
i love the idea of him thinking that he’s SO POWERFUL that he has to talk himself out of hurting others.
wait, that’s ANOTHER interpretation!
okay so my thinking was: hammer is telling everyone out there not to hurt ‘em
‘em = kids, pets, society
“please hammer don’t hurt ‘em” is like hammer telling everyone, “hey guys. love each other. don’t hurt people”